Parity of esteem? Particles of it more like

It’s curios how tastes change as life goes on. Literally and in terms of life in general. When I was younger, coleslaw, potato salad, Branston Pickles or beetroot wouldn’t be touched with a barge pole.

On the other hand, though, now, at the appropriate time of year, a feed can’t be had without some or all of the above. All bar salad cream – that stuff should be designated as terrorist weaponry.

Stray into other facets of life and the instances of viewpoints changing turn voluminous. From an Irish perspective, probably the greatest example of same there could be is the fact that Fianna Fail and Fine Gael now govern together. Civil War politics is finally dead and gone. Good thing or bad thing? The jury is still out.

Another example of change over time – back in the day, the thought of watching current affairs programmes such as Today Tonight/Prime Time, Questions And Answers or Leaders’ Questions would have me speeding for barf bucket. At some point, though, what is now a bit of political junkie in this seat saw the light of day.

There is absolute certainty that some of that can be traced back to the 1999 Local and European elections, but if one was to go back even slightly further than that, political satire in the guise of Dermot Morgan, Gerry Stembridge and Pauline McLynn and the shamefully ditched nugget of gold that was Scrap Saturday. However, like many other facets of life, horizons on that front were also broadened with the acquisition of more television stations circa 1993.

Thus, the likes of Rory Bremner, Have I Got News For You, Mock The Week and, in more recent times, Russell Howard, have become essential parts of the viewing schedule in that sphere. On the home front in the same bracket, when Dermot died suddenly in 1998, Irish comedy – and in particular political satire – was left with a gaping void which in fairness nobody could be reasonably expected to fill.

That’s not to say, of course, that others weren’t going to try. Of course they did. And in a very high percentage of ways they succeeded too. While Conor Moore (wisely) has steered clear of political satire to date – there’s copious other material with which to work in the genre – so it would probably most accurate to plump that the Apres Match lads – Mario Rosenstock, Risteard Cooper and Gary Murphy have come closest to mimicking the Scrap Saturday.

That said, as good as Gift Grub has undoubtedly been over the years, for me, Rosenstock has to force the act a bit when doing the likes of, say, Michael Flatley, though in fairness to him, I’ve yet to see anybody get close to the quality of ‘his’ Joan Burton.

Though in the heal of the hunt – and maybe this on my part is just because he’s a country man – in more recent years, I would put it to anybody willing to listen that, in terms of political satire, Oliver Callan is streets ahead of all other comers.

Thus, his Callan’s Kicks has undoubtedly taken over the mantle from the Morgan/Stembridge/McLynn ensemble.

Not that Oliver needs any help, but, it has to be said that the last few years have been a gold mine for disciples of his trade. Between FF and FG governing together, British Royal Chaos and the constantly erupting Trump volcano.

Yet in the last few days there’s one particular line pertaining to the political bromance between Micheal Martin and Simon Harris which the comic regularly uses and which had been doing laps in my head.

The one in which high pitched Harris is demanding that the ‘Co-Teesh’ guarantee him ‘Parity Of Esteem’.

But here’s the thing – Callan could, with consumate ease, do a skit on parity of esteem revolving around the Camogie Association and the LGFA. The only problem is, it’d be too close to the truth!

Where to begin – well, integration of the different arms of GAA sports. Particularly the LGFA and the Camogie Association with the ‘main’ GAA itself. Before they even thinking about that, though, both could do with a bit of domestic housekeeping.

On one side, you have the LGFA who, on one weekend, fixed the Meath ladies to play away to Waterford at the same time as three other Meath teams. Most notably the Camogie team, and this coming weekend, have them playing Kildare in Hawkfield (also Newbridge) two hours before the lads play the same opposition in St Conleth’s. Could heads not have been banged together and the fixtures made into a double header? Parity of esteem? Particles of it more like!

Mind you, the same weekend left the CA with bigger issues in their ‘in’ tray than fixtures clashing. Namely, infrastructure around and arrangements for fixtures in the Very Ireland National League. Now, Meath’s Karen Dessain-Gelinet might be only weeks into her role at the head of the Camogie Association (CA) but if the Dunshaughlin native and former Kilmessan and Ratoath player felt the integration situation was going to be her most pressing issue, events in the south of Ireland on Sunday last immediately jumped to the front of the queue.

The condition of the pitch in Clare Abbey – itself a backup choice – (below) is the closest the one seeing eye here has encountered to Clones on the day of the mudbath Ulster SFC Final of 1993.

However, as always, the devil is in the fine print. The most obvious nugget of which is that while it was slightly easier to give Clones the go ahead back them as it was a football match. In contrast, how Clare Abbey was declared fit for a camogie match between Clare and Wexford, and by whom is baffling.

Mind you, the condition of the pitch will be only one of a number of bullet points on the agenda for Karen and her people. There’s also:

• Why was a match permitted to take place before the National League fixture?
• Did the (camogie) match referee independently inspect the pitch?
• If so, how was the decision it was playable arrived at?
• At what point was it known that there was a problem with dressing room allocation?
• As a result of same, who (a) suggested the Wexford team tog out on their bus, and (b) at what point were the offered the room upstairs?
• Did either side pick up any injuries on the day. And, if so, with whom does liability ultimately lie?

So, while parity of esteem might be the ultinate and a highly admirable objective, make sure you’ve your own house in order before inviting admirers in to view.